I am very tired... felt kinda sick... eating less and less... I am getting more and more lethargic each passing day... I just wanna rest... have a day to myself... have a day to relax and freed my thoughts... Wanted to take leave but looking at my colleagues who is going to have a short MC next week for wisdom tooth extraction... Looking at Ah neh, he is always playing punks, don't know when is he around.... reporting sick now and then... I am terribly disappointed with him... I hate myself believing him times after times that he told me that he will change... BUT till this very moment, I still believe he is a capable guy, and I really hope he can change, learned to work hard... put his words into actions...

this I really must agree with Andy, he asked me to start to think more about myself rather than others... Be self-centered... am I too selfless?? wat is wrong to spare a thought for others?? what is wrong with the motto "Before Self"..... Andy asked me, "Do I live for myself or others?" I am really puzzled... aren't we born into this world to help each other as one can't survive alone... Aren't we supposed to engage in one and other and help to motivate one and other? Am I very naive?? I believe everyone is able to change to a better person... I am giving chances after chances, believing people lies after lies.... I am getting very tired and terrible...

I have a feeling that my mental is breaking down soon... soon..... soon..... why am I putting a false front?? tears at my eyes......